so there is this little matter i ponder every day of my life. it's actually not a little matter, it's quite important. it will affect me every day for the rest of my life.
what am i going to do after i'm done being an au pair?
this is essentially why i became an au pair. i have no idea what to do with my life. i need to do lots of things: go to grad school, get a good job, find a man partner (not sure about marriage), have babies (maybe. i thought i didn't want any until i saw a tiny one yesterday, but that a different story), BE CONTENT THAT I'M DOING SOMETHING WITH MY LIFE.
it's just that i get stuck at the first thing on the list. i have no idea what i want to study in grad school. this is complicated by not knowing what kind of job i would want to do after grad school. and this complicates the finding a man part because no man wants a broke woman who lives in a box and smells like old french fries (if you live in a box, you don't have a shower. duh). and anyone can have babies, but i'd rather not do it alone whilst homeless.
oh, how joyful life is.
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